Intro: The Bliss Mess Of Ascension

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We are shifting. We are awakening. We are evolving. We are becoming Sacred Humanity. We are currently in a phase of major consciousness shift from what we have known as five-sense based life to much more expanded consciousness in response to all areas of our lives. Five-sense based reality filters most of what we experience through a flattening lens of literalness, rationality, and practicality. The mind dominates mainstream culture, fueled by the unhealed wounded masculine or Patriarchy. The wounded masculine shows up in relationships of all kinds and in all kinds of ways and is a root cause of much suffering, pain, and violence - along with the wounded feminine.

 

This ‘age of reason’ and expression of the wounded masculine has been needed until it was no longer serving our deepening evolution as a species. The cutting edge of our evolution is about shifting our consciousness to include healing of the wounded masculine; arising of the Sacred Feminine; healing of our emotional bodies and core shadow-based woundings; activation of our Higher Heart’s capacities of compassion and creative intuition; and integration of metaphysical, esoteric, spiritual, energetic, and non-dualistic consciousness states into our experiences of everyday, practical life.

 

This shift has long been prophesied and energized as a timeline that would occur in this Now, beginning in the 1960’s and activating at particularly accelerated and deepening levels starting in 2012. Many of us have chosen to be here during this time to experience and serve this grand shift in consciousness for our own soul’s growth and to contribute to the transformation of the collective too. We came here to be witnesses, active participants, leaders/teachers/students and audience during this exciting, epic, and often tumultuous show.

 

This process of awakening and shifting consciousness is generally called ‘Ascension.’ Ascension offers an internal shifting rather than a literal, exoteric experience of going to Heaven when dying and leaving the body, as offered in many religious pictures. The Heaven is within, ultimately, and can be experienced in the Now as increasingly higher vibrational frequencies of consciousness on all body levels - emotional, spiritual/chakral, social, physical, and mental - are activated within us. During Ascension, we increasingly experience life as a ‘Heaven on earth’ and ourselves as heavenly BEings having a human experience.

 

Ascension is a collective invitation, yet, an individual experience. Each soul is invited to ascend in every moment and with every choice point. In some ways, it is as simple as feeling that Ascension occurs (on both collective and personal levels) anytime we are choosing love over fear. The process of Ascension is happening on a soul level to all souls as it is natural, organic, and spring loaded to occur for and to all of us. There are not just some ‘special’ souls who are granted the gift of Ascension. The degree and rate that the Ascension process can be consciously experienced and deepened is dependent on what each soul has signed up for and where they are in their growth journey.

 

Rather than some grand, sweeping moment where all souls are ascended into a blissful Heaven because they qualify for it and are ‘redeemed’, Ascension is actually an ongoing process available to all of us that is marked by highs and lows, ups and downs, both struggles and triumphs, openings and closings. Ascension accepts that we are learning and growing; that we purposefully chose to forget our Divine nature so that we could remember it again; and that ultimately we are not broken, not sinful and do not need ‘saving’ by anything or anyone outside of us, even if we choose to have guides and teachers during phases of our journey. It is a love-based process that respects our sovereign choices, even if they are coming from resistance and fear.

 

During Ascension, we are experiencing a grand awakening of the soul, enlightening of the mind, enlovening of the heart, and crystallizing of the physical body. Awakening of the soul is our higher consciousness coming into our awareness bringing depth, meaning, connection with a ‘higher power’ or Divine Source, moving beyond personality and self image, and a deepening sense of passion purpose. The veils of amnesia that we chose as souls to put over ourselves when we incarnated here are lifting, so that we can ‘see’ and feel the multiple timelines for which our individual soul source, or Metasoul as we call it, or Higher Self, is expressing itself as many fractals projected out. The fractals all represent the whole, just as in nature. I will be sharing much more about the Metasoul in this book. The lifting of the veils gives us access to these Metasoul fractals from other timelines, archetypal energies (pre-programmed collectively held ‘typical’ patterns of seeing and responding to life that play out individually), our soul gift expressions, higher consciousness states, and our karmic binds and soul pattern woundings.

 

Enlightening of the mind expands our mental capacities beyond the rational, logical, and linear into experiences of the non-dualistic fabric of reality, into more quantum, multidimensional reality processing from the intuitive, creative, right side, of our brains. We are shifting out from a left brain focus that has been conditioned and trained by our educational systems and emphasis on academic learning and attainment. It becomes less important to be tracking, analyzing, and understanding with our minds what we experience. We experience more ‘loose brain’ moments where the grids of the mental body expand and, in some ways, ‘drop’ so that we can feel the arising magic and Is-ness of everything.

 

Enlovening of the heart offers the healing of emotional woundings, opening up of defenses, feeling our vulnerability and sensitivity, and being able to transact intimacy with ourselves and others. We move out of codependency-based relationships based on duty and obligation that offer familiarity and comfort, yet we have outgrown on the soul level. We are more drawn to soul resonance and transactability on all levels of heart, mind, soul, and body. The primary, foundational relationship that provides a source of constant love is first with ourselves and all aspects of us.

 

Crystallizing of the body happens as our every living cell transitions from carbon-based to crystalline frequencies and into more expression of the pure light and love energy that it is. This process also activates previously dormant DNA strands as well as the pineal and pituitary glands, which become transmitters and receivers of the light codes that come in from Cosmic sources. Our bodies become truly a treasured vessel, held with honor and respect for their health and well being.

 

Ascension is both a collective experience (whether people are conscious of it or not) and a very personal one. Gaia herself is going through Ascension and raising her vibrational frequency as a planetary consciousness from the third dimensional Earth to much higher. What this means is that there is a necessary transitional phase for Gaia (and for us) of turmoil, death and rebirth, chaos, upheavals, and disorder as the old collapses to make way for the new. For Gaia, this dis-ease manifests itself in global warming, extreme weather patterns and shifts, and a sense of lovingly ‘shaking off’ some of Her human guests as and if necessary. Feeling Gaia as a planetary consciousness that is evolving along with us allows for a sense of collaboration and individual choice in our relationship with Her, rather than the dominant, disconnected, and adversarial one that has been so prevalent for so long.

 

Ascension is the process of moving inward, moving onward, and moving upward. The moving inward is about becoming inward focused rather than externally focused. Moving inward is about going within during meditative states; through therapeutic, deep feeling-based senses of ourselves as we connect with and integrate different multidimensional aspects of ourselves; and through tracking what is happening inside of us and not just reacting to external triggers and situations. As we move inward, we become so much more aware of our internal world and see that what we experience ‘outside’ of us is a reflection of the inside.

 

Moving onward is healing beyond the traumas of our past experiences, both this life and from other lifetimes. Onward is to be in the Now, present moment, rather than constantly associating with or dissociating from previous situations and circumstances. Moving onward is feeling the root cause of our traumas, feeling them and healing them in order to transform the energies that are stuck in the past that are very accessible in the Now, until they vibrate more in alignment with our essence. Onward means that we are no longer anchored to the past and to the experiences that we had then with much more fluidity to let in the present.

 

Moving upward is raising our consciousness frequency from third dimensional (3D) to transitional fourth dimensional (4D) to heavenly fifth dimensional (5D) and beyond. Upward is bridging to higher vibrational frequencies of love and light from within our human bodies and integrating those energies with our human hearts. Upward is our Higher Self coming into our body and, therefore, into our conscious awareness, eventually becoming our primary expression of self in the world. Upward is about experiencing Heaven in the Now and from within us, not as a place we ‘go to when we die’, yet rather what we can know right in this moment. I’ll be sharing much more in this book about the differences between 3D, 4D, and 5D consciousness states and the selves and parts of us that form around the experience of them through teachings along with sharing my personal experiences and process navigating this ground.

 

Ascension is a labor process for Humanity as a collective as well as on an individual basis with tightness, pain, and birth contractions, then bursts of joy, relief, soul bigness expression, and love. This is a messy process, as all births are……it can be like riding an edge of near devastating loss while experiencing blissful, opening vistas of deepening love for self and with others. Letting go while you are letting in and the seemingly paradoxical feelings that come up from the emotional body as this is navigated.

 

Ascension is going into the bliss mess to emerge more and more whole, complete, and sacred. The bliss aspect comes from bringing in higher dimensional frequencies of love, Unity Consciousness, and joy. Tastes of Unity Consciousness remind us of the Divine Source we came from and how connected we were in thoughts, feelings, and ideas with each other. This sense of unity offers a balm to heal the wounds that come from being separated and isolated from each other and, in many ways, from ourselves too. We also experience increasing unity with Divine Source, with the remembrance that we are a fractal from the Divine, and that we will eventually return to this state and can connect with this energy now through our Higher Selves.

 

The bliss is reuniting with our higher dimensional consciousness aspects of our Higher Self that vibrate to angelic frequencies and dimensional states; with Star BEing Aspects from other planets and galaxies; and with aspects that share the same Metasoul as us from other lifetimes and timelines. We experience intense reunion feelings as we are reuniting, integrating, and merging our previously 3D-based consciousness with the much higher ones available through most of these aspects. The bliss happens as we move out of the 3D reality of polarity, fear-based duality and separation…...and into fifth dimensional 5D love-based community and intimacy with self and others. The bliss is the feelings of being One yet not the same, or what I call ‘conscious duality’.

 

The mess aspects of Ascension are the decisions and choice points that happen as your soul awakens and moves into your consciousness. What you desire and want in relationships of all kinds shifts as you seek out more soul and values resonance. This can lead to phases of letting go, death, and mourning with fallouts in relationships, conflict, and pain. 3D life loses much of its meaning and significance as you pull up the anchor from it, along with what you have been conditioned to believe about it.

 

The mess aspects of Ascension are about the healing of the 3D Self that has been doing and being in the polarized, fear-based 3D world. The mess is identifying the protective layers that had to be created over the preciousness of your innocence, your essence as a love sponge, your heart and soul porosity. Feeling these protective layers gets messy because they’ve been created to keep you safe. They run on fear and the modulation of love. The mess is the undigested pain and wounding that live in your emotional body, stuck there and still energizing there because there is not linear time for the emotional body. Traumas are freeze-framed in the moments that they happen and ‘pool’ and ‘pocket’ in the emotional body, forming into parts of yourself or subpersonalities, awaiting your curiosity and connection.

 

The bliss is the relief that comes out the other side from feeling and healing and BEing with these layers, these pockets, these wounds, and these traumas. This is the cathartic relief of finally releasing what has long been pent up and trapped energies in our emotional bodies and soul fields.  Going through the mess to get to the bliss is the process for embodying our Sacred Humanity or our Higher Self coming more into our bodies and consciousness.

 

It is necessary to experience both the bliss and the mess to ascend, awaken your soul, enloven your heart, enlighten your mind, crystalize your body. To just reach for and want the bliss aspects of Ascension is to miss out on the gifts that going into your deepest densities and shadows offers you. There is a wealth to your woundedness. Not that you need fixing, yet, going into your woundedness and healing allows you to free up your essence and bigness from the wounded frequencies. This is a spring-loaded process that just happens organically as you open up to experiencing both the bliss and the mess.

 

There is a necessary gestation period, a necessary cocooning, within this bliss mess Ascension and awakening process. This is a time of growing and learning, becoming more aware and conscious about 3D life and the limits it has placed on your consciousness. This may happen mostly on a mental level for a phase of time, where you are finding new resources offering a picture that is an expansion beyond what you have been conditioned to believe about reality from your 3D cultural indoctrination called ‘school.’ Your curiosity grows as your mind expands into the Infinite Possibilities that arise when the ceiling of five sense perception is lifted.

 

Then, your awakening moves into more personal grounds as your desires to end suffering and experience more love grow inside of you. This especially manifests within relationships where the previous grounds are no longer enough and longings of deeper soul resonance and intimacy are growing from within you. There is much at stake then, in a deeply personal way, as the old timelines begin to collapse and new ones come into BEing that are fueled by your heart and soul desires for a life of authenticity, service to love, and BEing YOU.

 

What is at stake is the reality that parts of you have created and the rumbling caused by the question of, “Is this an expression of my soul or is it not?” What is at stake are relationships and whether they will go deeper into arising grounds of soul, heart, and mind connection or whether they will complete. What is at stake are previous means of livelihood that required you to shrink your soul reason and purpose for BEing here. What is at stake is comfortable geographies and living situations that keep you hooked into frequencies that you are outgrowing as a soul.

 

It, then, is a phase of letting go, as you feel what has been previously comfortable and safe begins to feel more and more confining to your Soul Self or 5D Self. The energies being offered by Divine Source are wanting to facilitate the birthing of the new you and the letting go of the old in all areas of life. This invitation is meant to manifest for you in a real and tangible way……in the physical, in the mental, in the emotional, in the spiritual, in the financial, in the environmental areas of your life. What has been put into or related to from a compartment becomes flooded by the catalytic waters of love. In this flood, you do not drown but rather learn to float, learn to surrender, learn to get used to the sensation of moving waters.

 

Your bliss mess gestation period may be coming to completion. You are birthing a new you into a new world even while the old one may be collapsing around you. This can be a very intense experience and, in moments, can feel almost unbearable to navigate for parts of you as the world they have known is falling down. The sense of love with yourself, with others who are in soul resonance with you, and with the Divine offers support during this transition. Connecting and holding space for the reactions that come up in the emotional body allows for moving through and digestion. These love frequencies with self and others become the midwife of your butterfly self who has left the cocoon behind in order to soar the skies of a reality with Infinite Love possibilities as you BEcome Infinite Love in human form!

 

We have been Star BEings, Oneness consciousness, much more than we have been human BEings. We are here to experience the bliss mess (yes, both) of feeling. The bliss mess, the highs and lows, the ups and downs, the suffering and the joys, the tears and the laughs.

 

Oh, this is our humanity in all its glory. Angels and Star BEings are watching us, admiring us, merging with us (when our consciousness and emotional body are ready) more and more to experience this emotional experience of reality through and with us. They are not judging our emotional states, yet do hope for the end of our suffering over suffering and for us to heal from the karmic patterns that can unconsciously haunt us, so that we can merge with them some more and create something completely new.

 

Our hearts are the beacon that shines across the stars and draws attention from around the galaxy….

 

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June 3, 2017 - 

 

The waters are receding. The image I was given in mediation today with Archangel Metatron was of each of us being an island whose waters are receding back to reveal more and more of the land mass beneath it. The waters are the veil of amnesia and forgetfulness and unconsciousness that we chose, as a Collective Consciousness, to place over ourselves. We became like individual islands, or believed that we were, creating an isolated and separate experience of reality. When actually, as we move into 5D frequencies more and more, we remember that we are all connected as One, like a piece of land that has no ending or gaps or drop offs. We remember that there is nothing actually separating us from each other and it was only an illusion to feel that we were.  

 

As the waters recede, you have more access to remember, feel, and connect with your soul legacy or what I have been offered by Metatron to call our ‘Metasoul’. Because time in higher dimensions is not linear, you are invited to feel that rather than ‘past lives’, you are a fractal from a higher frequency Metasoul source with many projections off this source living out in different ‘eras of time’, dimensions, and even planets, that are all accessible to you in the Now. You share a Metasoul with aspects living out timelines in Atlantis, Lemuria, Ancient Greece and Egypt. Or, from other dimensions such as Avalon and the Faerie Realm. And, also, Metasoul Aspects that come from different planets and even galaxies, such as Arcturian, Sirian, and Pleiadian. These Metasoul Aspects are not in the distant or ancient past at all, yet rather in the Now of non-linear experience. 

 

You can gain great information about your soul by connecting with your Metasoul Aspects and working toward mutual healing together. In my experience of this conscious connection process with myself and offering this with others, karmic patterns and even very deep soul legacy play outs can be healed in a quantum way with ongoing resolution and integration. I have experienced that there is a rich and meaningful gift exchange that happens between myself and a Metasoul Aspect during our relationship with each other. Usually, I offer them emotional body digestion and heart healing while they offer me experience of higher dimensional consciousness states and access to soul gifts. This ‘gift exchange’ leads to eventual integration of these gifts and consciousness states into our awakening self or what we call our ‘5D Self’ in the SoulFullHeart process. Both myself and the Metasoul Aspect are transformed during this exchange in deeply meaningful ways.

 

As the waters of amnesia recede, you also have more sense of the deeper woundings that have been suppressed in your emotional body. In the past, your emotional body may have been largely subconscious to you with awareness coming only in moments of emotional reactivity, crisis, or turmoil. My experience has been that fluidity of bridging to your emotional body becomes possible through connecting with aspects or parts of you that have solidified into ‘stuck’ frequencies or energies due to undigested emotions and traumas. Some of these 3D-based parts express as the Inner Protector, Inner Matriarch and Patriarch, Inner Teenager, and Inner Child. These are all expressions of the 3D Self that is created as we incarnate and live out life here in a density that requires us to fragment ourselves in order to survive.

 

So much of our 3D world has run on deception, manipulation, deceit, lack of transparency, and non-vulnerability. So much of its manifestation has been fed by fear. These lower vibrational frequencies only sustain when we are disconnected from parts of ourselves, our soul bigness, our Higher Heart, our sense of Oneness connection, and our connection with Divine Source. They have ‘ruled our world’ because they were meant to for a phase of time, for the phase of ‘Dark Ages’ that we all signed up to experience, as these energies needed to be purged from humanity’s collective unconscious. We have been collectively experiencing a Dark Night Of The Soul, even as many of us are waking up into a Light Day Of The Soul phase as our next Now.

 

The ability of parts of you to hide much of anything from yourself and from others is greatly being challenged by the influxes of love and light waves flowing in from the Divine. The light invites you to illuminate what has been in shadow within you and to bring it into your awareness and consciousness. The pure love invites you to embrace what has been previously judged, suppressed, and resisted within you in order to heal the fear-based frequencies INside and transmute them into love.

 

‘Affairs’ of any kind become impossible with the high vibrational frequencies that are being offered to us now. Withholding becomes unappealing as the truth wants to just burst through your opening heart and your expanding soul. Self deception and deception of others runs out of ground inside you as the cost to the heart and soul is too great. The games that parts of you could previously play with others (especially those in your birth family) are no longer interesting to you.

 

This seems to be mostly felt on a personal level in this phase, yet it does feel like it will be a more global experience as well and that it is already in process. Disclosure is happening more and more of the 3D Matrix control system that has been in place and the lower frequency energies of deceit and deception that have kept it running. Many Star BEings previously polarized to fear-based frequencies (commonly called Archons or Annunaki or Draco) are leaving Gaia and choosing either to BE in love or to BE in fear somewhere else. Much shadow will be coming to light and some of it will be potentially very distressing to emotionally digest, especially for those souls who are still very attached and fused to 3D consciousness. Some people will not survive this disclosure phase and choose instead to leave Gaia and their bodies.

 

The more that a personal disclosure has been occurring in your life through the awakening process, the less it will impact you as the global disclosure occurs. The more transparent you have been in your own life, the less it will affect you as the lack of transparency on a collective level is revealed and purged. The more parts of you have let go of 3D conditioning and lifestyle, the less it will rumble through your world when some of the 3D systems collapse. The more you have energized and chosen a love-based life for yourself, the more this higher timeline will unfold for you.

 

Surrendering into the process of personal disclosure is where your empowerment is, rather than focusing too much on the global play outs. Going within to explore the inner terrain that is being revealed to you offers the most opportunity for growth. Surrendering to the bigger container of Divine love that is holding the process allows you to go within, leading with courage the exploration of this new inner landscape that is being revealed to you. You become like an explorer then, seeking out the next and the next NEW terrain inside. You then invite others to do and BE this with you as you connect to the Oneness energies of Infinite Love for which we are all connected and BElong and ARE!

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June 5 - 

 

My heart is holding some sadness today. A sadness of seemingly not being able to alter a soul play out in my Metasoul. I have heard for so long of the ‘fall of Atlantis’, yet it has often felt vague, something murky or more like fantasy. As my personal veil is lifting and the inner disclosure process invites me in, I am receiving downloads from other lifetimes to feel and digest that feel grounded in my emotional body and even in my physical body. In this phase, after much emotional body healing and other soul theme healing, I am being invited to feel the fall of Atlantis and the role of my Metasoul within that.

 

I have been connecting with Mareeka, my Metasoul Sister from the last era of Atlantis. Each projection of our Metasoul contains energy, has experiences that are both intense and wonderful, holds expression of our soul gifts in some form or another. It seems that connecting with them consciously through journaling and meditation visits, which I have been doing for a few years now, brings in the possibilities of a deep healing of karmic binds and patterns that are looping through our Metasoul. Conscious connection allows for emotional healing of what has been previously undigested. Mutual exchange of gifts and consciousness expansion is another aspect of it. This depends on the consciousness level of the Metasoul aspect and what they have ‘signed up’ to experience in their life.

 

I also like holding these soul projections this way rather than as ‘my past lives’ because it allows for more objectivity. This can especially be important if the lifetime is one where the Metasoul has chosen to experience being famous or is connecting to a Universal ray or Archetypal expression (such as Yeshua, Mother Mary, Joan Of Arc, etc.) Rather than feeling that you ‘were’ this person or famous figure, you can feel how they share a Metasoul with you, so you are very connected and yet separate too. This helps the 3D Self (ego) from attaching to the other lifetime in a self image-based way and for you to hold space for the healing exploration.

 

I shared tears with Mareeka in the early morning dawn today, quietly talking out loud to her. She is mourning the ‘fall of Atlantis’, which she can see very clearly is going to happen (even though it hasn’t happened yet in her timeline). She is mourning a split between her and her once beloved soulmate Maliki, who has become ‘under the influence’ of shadow-based Reptilians. Reptilians are not all shadow-based, but these ones were called to serve a specific purpose of collapsing Atlantis. She offers me a picture of an Atlantis that has fallen already from its Golden Age. There are power struggles, dark magics being used and abused, and much deception going on. It feels very much like our current 3D world actually, which it feels like is going through its own ‘fall’ to arise out of the ashes into more of the higher vibrational frequencies of the Golden Atlantis.

 

I feel how I cannot prevent the fall of Atlantis, yet we may be able to alter Mareeka’s experience of her own timeline playing out. I feel her fears and tensions in my heart. I offer her compassion as I connect some textures to my relationship with Raphael in the ‘trailing edge’ of our bond to what Mareeka is experiencing. Maliki seems to be a Metasoul Aspect of Raphael’s. Being Counterpart Soulmates to each other, Raphael and I share many Metasoul timelines together, with his Metasoul Aspects seeming to consistently be the masculine expression to my feminine Metasoul Aspects. This differs somewhat from the Twin Flame picture, as I haven’t received support yet or guidance of confirmation for its sense of a masculine and feminine projection coming from the same soul and then choosing sometimes to incarnate during the same timeline in this Now. 

 

I feel there is a gift in feeling these textures with Mareeka and that it connects to my everyday experience in this life and in my relationship with Raphael. Intense energies moved through us yesterday and even into some conflictual moments. I believe an aspect of this was Mareeka and Maliki’s tensions coming ‘through’ us. This is why I went in today to feel my side of this and to create some space between me and Mareeka so that she did not project her wounding and pain onto my relationship with Raphael. I feel this happens often in relationships where the partners are not consciously healing their soul and heart. I believe this deeper feeling and healing access to our other Metasoul connections in other lifetimes is a big reason why Raphael and I experience the nourishing bond that we do in most moments, along with healing our emotional bodies and 3D Selves through parts work.

 

Energies of pure love and light from the Divine are making it safe for all of us to go into our other lifetimes while healing our emotional body in this life. We can trust that wherever we need to go into the shadows of our soul and heart will be held with love. We can weave between the heart and soul this way; we can create a self loving bridge to hold these inner explorations. We can open out into consciousness experiences from BEing at greater depths than have EVER been possible before in our human experiment. The Divine is holding space for these dive downs into ourselves and the emerging Sacred Human that arises as an expression of Infinite Love for which we ARE.

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